My personal journey as a Christ Follower, Husband, Father, Son, Brother, Ecclesiastical Leader, Coach, and Friend.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Keep Your Fork

I consider myself a fortunate man for many reasons. I have been fortunate to discover that in life that the guy with the most toys still dies and that the only thing that matters in the end is the choice I made concerning Christ. Further, I consider myself fortunate to have discovered the reality of God's love and additionally the love of a wife, a child, a parent, and a friend. As I write I think of a handful of guys that have been my close friends throughout my life. For these few men, I am grateful. As I contemplated these truths I thought of a story I heard about a young woman and her fork.

There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live. So as she was getting her things 'in order,' she
contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes.

She told him which songs she wanted sung at the service, what scriptures she would like read, and what outfit she wanted to be buried in.

Everything was in order and the Pastor was preparing to leave when the young woman suddenly remembered something very important to her. 'There's one more thing,' she said excitedly. 'What's that?' came the Pastor's reply. 'This is very important,' the young woman continued. 'I want to be buried with a fork in my right hand.' The Pastor stood looking at the young woman, not knowing quite what to
say. That surprises you, doesn't it?' the young woman asked.'Well, to be honest, I'm puzzled by the request,' said the Pastor.

The young woman explained. 'My grandmother once told me this story, and from that time on I have always tried to pass along its message to those I love and those who are in need of encouragement. In all my years of attending socials and dinners, I always remember that when the dishes of the main course were being cleared, someone would inevitably lean over and say, 'Keep your fork.' It was my favorite part because I knew that something better was coming...like velvety chocolate cake or deep-dish apple pie. Something wonderful, and with substance!'

So, I just want people to see me there in that casket with a fork in my hand and I want them to wonder 'What's with the fork?' Then I want you to tell them: 'Keep your fork, the best is yet to come.'

The Pastor's eyes welled up with tears of joy as he hugged the young woman good-bye. He knew this would be one of the last times he would see her before her death. But he also knew that the young woman had a better grasp of heaven than he did. She had a better grasp of what heaven would be like than many people twice her age, with twice as much experience and knowledge. She KNEW that something better was coming.

At the funeral people were walking by the young woman's casket and they saw the cloak she was wearing and the fork placed in her right hand. Over and over, the Pastor heard the question, 'What's with the fork?' And over and over he smiled.

During his message, the Pastor told the people of the conversation he had with the young woman shortly before she died. He also told them about the fork and about what it symbolized to her. He told the people how he could not stop thinking about the fork and told them that they probably would not be able to stop thinking about it either.

He was right. So the next time you reach down for your fork let it remind you, ever so gently, that the best is yet to come. Friends are a very rare jewel, indeed. They make you smile and encourage you to succeed. They lend an ear, they share a word of praise, and they always want to open their hearts to us.

Proverbs 17:17 says, "A friend loves at all times..."

Friday, April 16, 2010

Go-To Players

As this year's NBA basketball playoffs are beginning, I am more optimistic than ever that my hometown team, the Cleveland Cavaliers will win the championship. My optimism has grown as I have watched the development of our star player and team MVP, LeBron James. He is what I call a go-to guy. He is the one when the game is on the line and it is time to bring the championship home to Cleveland that the team and our city looks to as our go-to guy.

In basketball, when the game is on the line, coaches want to get the ball in the hands of their best player. They design plays that go to the player with the greatest skill, and they trust that player to make the game-winning shot.

Businesses and ministries, like sports teams, also have go-to people. These high performers can be counted upon to come through in the clutch. They are entrusted with the biggest projects, and they are expected to deliver. Since they have a track record of success, go-to players are called upon to respond to challenges and orchestrate turnarounds.

In the Ivey Business Journal, Jeffrey Gandz, gives a snapshot of a go-to performer, and he lends advice on managing them.

Qualities of a Go-To Performer

1. They are politically astute without being corporate politicians

Go-to performers can navigate the interplay of personal interests within the workplace without falling prey to selfish ambition. They attractively promote company values and esteem organizational success on par with personal advancement.

2. They have power, but prefer to empower

A go-to performer recognizes that sharing power is preferable to hoarding top-down authority. Such a person empowers teammates and draws out the best from those around them.

3. They are negotiators with a non-negotiable impulse for success

Go-to players are pragmatists. They expertly arrive at compromises to unify the members of the organization. They know when to press their opinions and when to back off on nonessentials. At the same time, they have an unwavering standard of excellence which they refuse to compromise. By setting the bar high for performance, they raise the level of excellence throughout their sphere of influence.

4. They are networkers

Go-to performers value connectedness. They naturally lend advice, talents, and relationships to others, and, in doing so, develop a web of friends and supporters. When a favor is needed, they have an ample network from which to draw.

5. They think outside of the box while acting inside the box

Go-to performers aren’t bound by conventional thinking. They readily step beyond traditional systems to explore a realm of possibility. At the same time, go-to performers have the emotional intelligence to invite others into their creative process. They aren’t out to overthrow the established culture, but, as Gandz writes, “They use the culture to change the culture; they know how to use channels effectively, and when there are no channels they create new, legitimate ones rather than acting as revolutionaries and mavericks.”

Managing a Go-to Performer

1. Challenge them

As Gandz observes, go-to performers, “Are natural high achievers and sometimes the biggest challenge is keeping them challenged.” They thrive on stretching themselves and testing their talents. Go-to players should be kept on the forefront of the action so that their zest for a challenge has an outlet.

2. Value them

Go-to performers, given their dependability and capacity to excel, often are handed a disproportionate share of the workload. Although likely to enjoy having a lion’s share of responsibility, go-to players may feel taken for granted if they don’t receive recognition. In light of their contributions, go-to players should be applauded as team MVP’s and given credit for their accomplishments.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Small or Large?

As I contemplated on the scripture today my attention was drawn to 1 Corinthians 15:58 which says, "Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain."

God makes some people large, others moderate in stature. Still others are small in size. We frequently make the mistake of calling small folks "little," but that is an unfortunate and unfair tag. I'm not picking at terms . . . there is a great deal of difference between being small and being little. If you don't think so, just ask someone who is less than average height. They won't hesitate telling you they may be small, but they're definitely not little. Being "little" implies much more than being short. It suggests being petty, lacking in great-heartedness, having a mind that is restrictive, suspicious, envious, spiteful. "Little" people (regardless of their physical size) find it extremely difficult to applaud another's achievement, especially if the accomplishments bear the marks of success and excellence. While there are many who are big enough to appreciate outstanding work, there is always the "little" world comprising those who frown, depreciate, question, doubt, criticize, and forever search for the flaw.

Many years ago there was a young, small company in Detroit, Michigan. The odds against its surviving were heavy. But this struggling firm was determined not to lower its standard. Excellence and quality craftsmanship would not be compromised---period. There would be no tolerance for mediocrity, no winking at a cheap and shoddy "let's-just-get-by" philosophy. At that time it wasn't part of a huge corporation (that came later), and even though it was eclipsed by much larger and more powerful competitors, this resilient, independent company stayed by its standard. Interestingly, it slowly gained recognition as a leader.

The company published an advertisement in The Saturday Evening Post, January 2, 1915. Here is what it said: The Penalty of LEADERSHIP In every field of human endeavor he that is first must perpetually live in the white light of publicity. Whether the leadership be vested in a man or in a manufactured product, emulation and envy are ever at work. In art, in literature, in music, in industry, the reward and the punishment are always the same. The reward is widespread recognition; the punishment, fierce denial and detraction. When a man's work becomes a standard for the whole world, it also becomes a target for the shafts of the envious few. If his work be merely mediocre, he will be left severely alone---if he achieve a masterpiece, it will set a million tongues a-wagging. Jealousy does not protrude its forked tongue at the artist who produces a commonplace painting. Whatsoever you write, or paint, or play, or sing, or build, no one will strive to surpass or slander you, unless your work be stamped with the seal of genius. Long, long after a great work or a good work has been done, those who are disappointed or envious continue to cry out that it cannot be done. Spiteful little voices in the domain of art were raised against our own Whistler as a mountebank, long after the big world had acclaimed him its greatest artistic genius. Multitudes flocked to Bayreuth to worship at the musical shrine of Wagner, while the little group of those whom he had dethroned and displaced argued angrily that he was no musician at all. The little world continued to protest that Fulton could never build a steamboat, while the big world flocked to the river banks to see his boat steam by. The leader is assailed because he is a leader, and the effort to equal him is merely added proof of that leadership. Failing to equal or to excel, the follower seeks to depreciate and to destroy---but only confirms once more the superiority of that which he strives to supplant. There is nothing new in this. It is as old as the world and as old as the human passions---envy, fear, greed, ambition, and the desire to surpass. And it all avails nothing. If the leader truly leads, he remains---the leader. Master-poet, master-painter, master-workman, each in his turn is assailed, and each holds his laurels through the ages. That which is good or great makes itself known, no matter how loud the clamor of denial. That which deserves to live---lives.

I am aware that all sorts and sizes of people will read this piece. A few of you are "little," hard as it may be to face it. But I'm convinced that many more of you are "big," which, being translated, means visionary, courageous, bold, secure, productive, unafraid of hard work, and unintimidated by the odds. Good for you! Press on. Grow even bigger. Stand tall. Run hard as you set a new pace. Refuse to reduce your stride. Embrace quality and excellence and determination. Without fudging one inch on integrity and humility, push on . . . lead on. Ignore the "little" world of onlookers who are too petty to produce, too suspicious to affirm, too envious to acknowledge greatness. Go hard after your goal, get on with it!